Understanding Neurodivergence and ARFID
- Rachel at Taking Care Counselling
- Nov 6
- 3 min read
Exploring Eating Through a Neurodivergent Lens
In my work as a neuro-affirming counsellor, I often support clients who feel overwhelmed, ashamed, or misunderstood around food. For many neurodivergent individuals, these challenges can be linked to a lesser-known eating disorder:
ARFID (Avoidant Restrictive Food Intake Disorder).
What Is ARFID and Why Does It Matter?
Unlike other eating disorders, ARFID isn’t about dieting or body image. It often stems from a deeply ingrained need for sensory safety, emotional regulation, or a response to past trauma involving food.
Eating disorders in the neurodivergent community are complex and often misunderstood. ARFID is frequently missed or misdiagnosed. Recognising the unique ways it shows up is essential to offering support that feels safe, not shaming.
The Three Main Types of ARFID
Avoidant – Driven by sensory sensitivities such as texture, smell, sound, or appearance of food.
Aversive – Linked to fear of choking, vomiting, or other distressing reactions.
Restrictive – Characterised by low interest in food, forgetting to eat, or challenges with executive functioning that make eating difficult or inconsistent.
Many people experience a blend of these. It’s not always one type or another.
Survival Strategies: Understanding Neurodivergence and Food Choices
So many of my clients describe “eating beige”: sticking to familiar, processed foods that feel safe and predictable. This isn’t picky eating. It’s a survival strategy.
Common ARFID experiences for neurodivergent individuals include:
Hyperfixation on one food, then complete avoidance once the interest fades
Low interoception (difficulty noticing hunger, thirst, or fullness)
Sensory overload from the textures, smells, or preparation of certain meals
PDA (Pathological Demand Avoidance) making food choices feel impossible
Trauma responses to past incidents like choking, vomiting, or allergic reactions
Social anxiety or fear of being judged when eating in front of others
All of these factors can seriously limit food intake, variety, and nutrition.
Building Trust in ARFID Support
Its not about forcing "normal"
One of the biggest mistakes I see is the pressure to “fix” eating by making clients eat more “normally.” But for neurodivergent individuals, what’s normal for one person can be deeply unsafe for another.
Forcing new foods or routines can backfire, reinforcing shame, overwhelm, and mistrust. Neuro-affirming therapy means understanding neurodivergence and food choices, and adapting to the person in front of us.
Not squeezing them into a neurotypical mould.
So How Do We Support Someone With ARFID?
Navigating disordered eating with compassion
Remove Shame: Many clients carry deep guilt, judgement and rigid rules around food, cooking & eating. Our first step in neuro-affirming therapy is always acceptance - acknowledging their experience without judgement.
Support Structure, Not Pressure: Make a reliable, sustainable, flexible plan. One food from each group is a great start. You can always fill in the gaps with supplements, vitamins, or nutritionally complete meal replacement drinks or bars while gently expanding options.
Foster a Safe Space:
Respect sensory needs
Encourage autonomy
If something doesn’t work out, that’s ok - we're exploring
Make safe foods readily available – even better if no prep is required
Try new foods when feeling brave. If not feeling brave, don’t
Never force exposure to new foods
Food challenges don’t mean failure.
With the right support incorporating compassion, choice, safety and a neuro-affirming approach, clients can move towards a better relationship with food, better nutrition, self-trust, and improved self-esteem.
The goal isn’t to “fix” anyone - but to honour and empower them, just as they are.
Hi, I'm Rachel and I'm a qualified neuro-affirming counsellor and therapeutic coach with ADHD who believes that everyone should be able to have their voice truly heard and accept themselves just as they are.
I specialise in Autism, ADHD, AuDHD, LGBTQIA+ issues, anxiety, depression,
and self-acceptance.
Whatever your reasons for seeking counselling, I want to offer you a compassionate and collaborative space where you feel comfortable to speak freely,
and to express your feelings and emotions in a way that suits you as an individual,
without judgement, or being told what to do.
If you’d like to know, more feel free to book a free 15-minute introductory Zoom meeting with me here:
Rachel Dowling
MBACP DIP Couns
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